Hurting, home and pensive.

Today I decided to skip school, which is completely out of character. It seemed like a good idea at 645am, but now at 1051am I'm bored. I'm bored and my mouth hurts. For some reason I've decided to write in this blog. Maybe if I write enough something worthwhile will fall out of me like magic. I have no idea how these things work, so I don't know if anyone will even read this blog. Do people even read these things?

I'm watching a movie about different families celebrating Thanksgiving. One family has a daughter who is dating another woman, one family has a daughter who is dating an older, Vietnamese man, one family has parents that hate eachother. Here's the thing, they don't say anything to anyone face to face. They wait until someone leaves the room and then they blab about who should and shouldn't be having their Thanksgiving with them. (No one is drinking yet, though. I'm sure once people sart drinking they'll be more upfront about things.) Anyway, my point here is- How do you we what kind of families we have? For all the planning we can do, all the speculation, we have no idea how our families will reaact to particular news. The kicker is, though, once it's out there, it's out there. There's no turning back.

Making adult decisions is tracherous because often they go against your familial plans, beliefs and , most often, both. It's like being trapped, but who is doing the trapping? Our whole lives we're told in one way or another "Don't worry so much what people think of you!" but, in response to that, we begin to worry about what the people who are saying it think of us. Why? Becuase if you don't care what anyone thinks of you, you will find yourself completely alone. and who wants that?