When time?

Lately I find myself in odd situations. Situations that would be good if I were a stronger, more adapted, developed person. However, I am a horrible coward and therefore I need to get myself out. It's one of those things where I don't know how to NOT be an asshole. I'd love to explain further, but I don't know how. I don't even know how I got here in the first place. Grrrrr. Why can't I just grow up and say "Fuck you people and what you think of me!" I have a lot to gain in some instances, but my fear of what I'll lose keeps me from risking. Is this human nature, or is this me being a child? When will I have some kind of clarity? When will I stop speaking in riddles and just SAY what I want to say?