Fuck all Y'all

Sometimes I forget just how bad people can be. I forget how rude and obnoxious and childish the human race is, especially the human race as it relates to my workplace.

2 incidents today.

First, I am in the lobby speaking to someone and a young woman walks by (out of HR) stops to assess me, rolls her eyes, sucks her teeth and keeps in moving. I wonder why she was in HR? hmmmm...Maybe because she's a nasty bitch who can't keep her judgemental opinions off her ugly face?

Second, about 5 minutes later another woman walks by and I look at her boots, which are adorable, and say "I really love your boots." She takes a horrible hands-on-hips stance and says "Oh, is that what yo' face is made for?? Is that why you lookin' at me??" and acts like she is going to fight me. Come to find out; she's a fucking team lead. Meaning, she is a MANAGER. With that attitude like that to a complete stranger, no less, she is responsible for managing other people. Excellent, right?

summary: someone coming out of HR gives me a look that could wilt roses, team lead tries to pick fight in lobby. We really seem to have it together over here, don't we? We really know how to treat each other. With this level of professionalism, I would not be surprised if I love New York took over our center and was prized for her wonderful attitude and level of human decency. Sometimes I start to like my job and then I remember to glance around and I remember why I don't like it here- people are so rude. So, my solution? Ipod and e-mail. If I don't have to speak to anyone, they can't snap back, right? :-/

Happy Thanksgiving

Whew, I never thought 2 numbers and some words could hurt so much. Finding out I make someone I love miserable 3 days out of 5 is probably on the top ten list of worst feeling ever.

...and I had no idea.

I'm tired and greasy.
My Mother is being horrible today. I have no space of my own because my sister will not stay out of my things, despite the fact that she is not a fucking 3 year old and should be able to follow simple requests.I snapped at my girlfriend and she talked to me like I was in pre-school, which made me snap harder at her.
All I want it a glass of wine, my bed, my dog, a good book and for my home to be completely empty of everything else.
I want to be fucking left alone today.

Pumpkin Pie

I just spoke with my neighbor, Scott. I love Scott. He went to see his surgeon today, and it looks like he has cancer again. This will be the 5th time. On the way out of his surgeons office he tripped over the curb, fell and the group of onlookers made him go to the emergency room. He's fine. Besides maybe having cancer again. It's bumming me out. He says it was worse falling in front of 6000 people than finding out he probably has cancer again. I really need to quit smoking. I really wish it wasn't coming on Christmas. I really wish that Scott and my Granmda were healthy. I wish everything was good for everyone right now. Holidays have no consideration for hard times, or the fact that some people (me) are never in the mood for them and see them as a cliff I can do nothing but fall over and then recover from. On a lighter note, I've found a present for him...

Apparently Pumpkin Pie Tasty cakes are not easy to find and he LOVES them. There's some curmudgeon who goes around and buys them all from the stores around here early in the morning. Hello, crazy. Scott found 2 at a gas station and he ate one- but he saved the other for me. ("It's just something you HAVE to experience!!!") But I can order them online. So he will be getting some, and this gives me a small glimmer of happiness- but it's even smaller than the stars that are covered by the smog and light of Baltimore that I'd like to wish on right now.

and I'm still bummed.

Whew

Every once in awhile I have to have a really good cry. A really hard, gasping, sobbing, I-need-a-shot-of-something-strong cry.

It just hapenned.

La Plata

We are going to La Plata this weekend to relax at the home of some friends, Ben & Adam, who just moved into an apartment there. I'm very happy to rest and cuddle up among friends and have a few drinks with some really nice people. We both need this, I think.